Young People
Do young Believers have a different call than adults? Is their standard for holiness different? Do they have less of the Holy Spirit? Is their call to be ambassadors for the King, make disciples, and unashamedly proclaim the Gospel to a lost and dying world less relevant or less expected?
Some of the disciples were thought to be teenagers when they were called by Jesus. In ancient Jewish culture, it was common for young men to begin studying with a rabbi and become disciples around the age of 13. Jesus, who himself was around 30 years old when he started His ministry, referred to His disciples at “little children,” which was a term of endearment but also likely indicated the disciples were younger than Jesus.
Timothy was called by Paul to join him in world missions when he was likely still a teenager or in his early 20s. Paul instructed Timothy to "let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe." Paul commends Timothy for his “genuine faith,” the same as that which was in his mother, Eunice, and grandmother, Lois. Paul’s expectation was Timothy "be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15).
Young people have played a significant role in starting many spiritual revivals throughout history, and their enthusiasm, creativity, and willingness to challenge the status quo have been instrumental in bringing about new movements of faith and spiritual practice. Some famous examples of spiritual revivals that were started by young people include the First and Second Great Awakenings in the United States, which were both sparked in part by young preachers who preached to large crowds of people, including many young people. Additionally, in the 1960s and 1970s, the Jesus Movement was a spiritual revival that started among young people in the United States and spread throughout the world.
Questions to answer with our counselee
General
What brings you here today?
How are you feeling right now?
What's been on your mind lately?
Can you tell me about a time when you felt really happy/sad/angry/anxious?
What do you think is causing you to feel this way?
What are some things that you enjoy doing?
What are some challenges that you are currently facing?
How do you usually cope with difficult situations?
What are some goals that you have for yourself?
Is there anything else that you would like to share with me?
Family
Can you tell me a little bit about your family? Who lives with you at home?
What are some things that you like about your family? What are some things that you don't like?
Have there been any recent changes in your family that have been difficult for you?
How do you and your family usually spend time together?
What do you think your family does really well together?
What are some things that you wish were different about your family?
Can you describe a time when you felt really connected to your family?
How do you feel when you have to leave your family (e.g. for school or other activities)?
What are some things that you wish your family understood better about you?
Is there anything that you would like to change or improve about your relationship with your family?
Friends/school
Can you tell me about your friends at school? Who are some of your closest friends?
What are some activities that you like to do with your friends?
Have you ever felt left out or excluded by your friends? How did that make you feel?
How do you feel about school? What are some things that you enjoy about it? What are some things that you find challenging?
Have you ever experienced bullying or teasing at school? How did you handle it?
What are some things that you wish your teachers or classmates knew about you?
Can you describe a time when you felt really proud of something you accomplished at school?
How do you usually handle conflicts or disagreements with your friends?
What are some things that you wish were different about your school experience?
Is there anything that you would like to change or improve about your friendships or school experience?
Spiritual
Can you tell me about your spiritual or religious background? How were you raised?
How important is spirituality or religion to you? What role does it play in your life?
What are some spiritual or religious beliefs that you hold dear? Why are they important to you?
Have you ever questioned your spiritual or religious beliefs? What prompted those questions?
Do you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ? Explain what this means and how it affects your life.
Do you spend time reading the Word of God? If so, when and what does this entail?
Do you spend time in prayer? If so, when and what does this entail?
How involved are you with Christians in a church or youth ministry environment? How does this impact your life?
How would you describe how religion plays out in your family?
How do you feel about the concept of forgiveness?
Stories to consider
David and Goliath (1 Samuel 17)
The story of David and Goliath takes place during the time of King Saul in the Old Testament, in the land of Israel. The Philistines had gathered their armies for battle and camped in the valley of Elah, while Saul and the men of Israel were camped on the other side of the valley (1 Samuel 17:1-3).
A giant Philistine champion named Goliath would come out day after day from the Philistine army and challenge the Israelites to send out a champion to fight him in single combat. Goliath was over nine feet tall and wore heavy armor, carrying a spear and a shield (1 Samuel 17:4-7).
All of the Israelite soldiers were afraid to face Goliath, but a young shepherd boy named David was not. David had come to the battle to bring food to his older brothers, who were soldiers in Saul's army. When Samuel anointed David as king of Israel, he was described as "a ruddy, handsome young man" (1 Samuel 16:12). Later, when David volunteered to fight Goliath, King Saul questioned his ability to do so, saying, "You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight him; for you are but a youth, and he has been a warrior from his youth" (1 Samuel 17:33). David's response to Saul indicated that he had already demonstrated bravery and skill in defending his father's flock from predators, including lions and bears (1 Samuel 17:34-37).
When David heard about Goliath's challenge, he volunteered to fight him (1 Samuel 17:12-37). Saul initially objected to David's offer, but David convinced him to let him fight Goliath. David refused to wear Saul's armor, instead taking only his sling and some stones from the brook. When Goliath saw David, he mocked him, but David responded with confidence, saying that he came in the name of the Lord (1 Samuel 17:38-45).
David then slung one of his stones at Goliath, striking him in the forehead and killing him. When the Philistines saw that their champion was dead, they fled, and the Israelites pursued them, winning a great victory (1 Samuel 17:46-54).
The story of David and Goliath demonstrates the power of faith in God over seemingly insurmountable odds. Despite being young and inexperienced, David was able to defeat the giant Goliath through his faith in God and his determination to stand up for his people.
Joseph (Genesis 37, 39)
The Bible does not give an exact age for Joseph when he was sold into slavery in Egypt, but based on the timeline given in Genesis, it is estimated that he was around 17 years old at the time. This is based on the fact that in Genesis 37:2, it says that Joseph was 17 years old when he was shepherding with his brothers, and shortly after that, he was sold into slavery.
After Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers, he was purchased by an Egyptian named Potiphar, who was an officer of Pharaoh and captain of the guard (Genesis 37:36; 39:1). Despite being a slave, Joseph quickly rose in the ranks of Potiphar's household, because God was with him and blessed everything he did (Genesis 39:2-4).
Potiphar entrusted Joseph with the management of his entire household, and everything that he owned, because he saw that God was with Joseph and that he was a responsible and capable person (Genesis 39:5-6). Joseph was successful in everything he did, and Potiphar did not have to worry about anything except for the food he ate (Genesis 39:6-7).
However, Joseph's fortunes took a turn for the worse when Potiphar's wife tried to seduce him. She repeatedly asked him to sleep with her, but Joseph refused, saying that he could not betray Potiphar's trust or sin against God (Genesis 39:8-9).
Despite Joseph's refusal, Potiphar's wife continued to pressure him day after day, but he never gave in to her advances (Genesis 39:10-12). Eventually, she became so angry that she falsely accused Joseph of trying to rape her and had him thrown into prison (Genesis 39:13-20).
But even in prison, God continued to bless Joseph and he gained favor with the prison warden, who put him in charge of all the other prisoners (Genesis 39:21-23).
Through all of these trials, even as a youth, Joseph demonstrated his faithfulness to God and his commitment to living with integrity. Despite being a slave, he had control over Potiphar's entire household because he was trustworthy and capable. And when he was faced with the temptation to sin, he chose to honor God instead.
It is possible for young people to lead well, have significant responsibility, and have victory over temptation. As with Joseph, God will honor a life lived in integrity. David was referred to by God as a man after His own heart—a resume built from the time he was a young man.
Verses for study
Instructions to children and young people
Ephesians 6:1-4: Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may turn out well for you, and that you may live long on the earth.
Colossians 3:20: Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing to the Lord.
2 Timothy 2:22: Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.
Proverbs 10:1: “A wise son makes a father glad, but a foolish son is a grief to his mother.”
Proverbs 15:20: “A wise son makes a father glad, but a foolish man despises his mother.”
Proverbs 17:21: “He who fathers a fool does so to his sorrow, and the father of a fool has no joy.”
Proverbs 17:25: “A foolish son is a grief to his father, and bitterness to her who gave birth to him.”
Proverbs 19:13a: “A foolish son is destruction to his father”
Proverbs 19:26: “He who assaults his father and drives his mother away Is a shameful and disgraceful son.”
Proverbs 20:11: ”It is by his deeds that a boy distinguishes himself, if his conduct is pure and right.”
Proverbs 20:20: “He who curses his father or his mother, his lamp will go out in time of darkness.”
Proverbs 23:22: “Listen to your father, who fathered you, and do not despise your mother when she is old.”
Proverbs 29:3a: “A man who loves wisdom makes his father glad”
Ecclesiastes 11:9: Rejoice, young man, during your childhood, and let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood. And follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. Yet know that God will bring you to judgment for all these things.
Disobedient children
Exodus 21:15: one who strikes his father or mother were to be put to death
Exodus 21:18-21: the stubborn and rebellious son, given to drinking, were to be stoned
1 Samuel 2:12-17,22-25: Eli’s sons were wicked and the Lord desired to put them to death
1 Samuel 8:1-5: Samuel’s sons were also wicked, which may be why, in part, Israel asked for a human king to rule over them
The fool
Psalm 14:1: “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’”
Proverbs 13:20: “One who walks with wise people will be wise, but a companion of fools will suffer harm.”
Proverbs 1:20-33: “For the faithlessness of the naive will kill them, And the complacency of fools will destroy them.”
Proverbs 10:10-12: “He who winks the eye causes trouble, and a babbling fool will come to ruin.”
Proverbs 12:15-16: “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a person who listens to advice is wise.”
Proverbs 14:15: “The naive believes everything, but the sensible person considers his steps.”
Proverbs 14:16: “A wise person is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is arrogant and careless.”
Proverbs 14:18: “The naive inherit foolishness, but the sensible are crowned with knowledge.”
Proverbs 15:21: “Foolishness is joy to one who lacks sense, but a person of understanding walks straight.”
Proverbs 18:2: “A fool does not delight in understanding, but in revealing his own mind.”
Proverbs 20:3: “Avoiding strife is an honor for a person, but any fool will quarrel.”
Proverbs 26:10-12: “Answer a fool as his foolishness deserves, so that he will not be wise in his own eyes.”
Seeking advice
Proverbs 11:14: “Where there is no guidance the people fall, but in an abundance of counselors there is victory.”
Proverbs 12:15-16: “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a person who listens to advice is wise.”
Proverbs 28:23: “One who rebukes a person will afterward find more favor than one who flatters with the tongue.”
2 Samuel 16:20-23: Absalom advised to sleep with David’s concubines in sight of all Israel
2 Samuel 17:14: Absalom sought advice on how to attack David and his men
1 Kings 12:1-15: Rehoboam accepted bad advice from his friends, and it cost him 10/12 of the kingdom
Proverbs 1:8-19: “Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction, and do not ignore your mother’s teaching”
Proverbs 2:1-19: “My son, if you will receive my words and treasure my commandments within you”
Proverbs 3:1-3: “My son, do not forget my teaching, but have your heart comply with my commandments”
Proverbs 4:1-9: “Listen, my sons, to the instruction of a father, and pay attention so that you may gain understanding, For I give you good teaching; Do not abandon my instruction.”
Proverbs 4:20-23: “My son, pay attention to my words; Incline your ear to my sayings.”
Proverbs 7:1-4: “My son, keep my words and treasure my commandments within you.”
Proverbs 13:10: “Through overconfidence comes nothing but strife, but wisdom is with those who receive counsel.”
Proverbs 14:7: “Leave the presence of a fool, or you will not discern words of knowledge.”
Proverbs 15:22: “Without consultation, plans are frustrated, but with many counselors they succeed.”
Proverbs 15:31-32: “One whose ear listens to a life-giving rebuke Will stay among the wise. One who neglects discipline rejects himself, but one who listens to a rebuke acquires understanding.”
Proverbs 19:20: “Listen to advice and accept discipline, so that you may be wise the rest of your days.”
Proverbs 20:18: “Prepare plans by consultation, and make war by wise guidance.”
Proverbs 25:11-12: “Like apples of gold in settings of silver, as a word spoken at the proper time. Like an earring of gold and a jewelry piece of fine gold, is a wise person who offers rebukes to a listening ear.”
Proverbs 27:5-6: “Better is open rebuke than love that is concealed. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.”
Proverbs 29:5: “A man who flatters his neighbor Is spreading a net for his steps.”
Put off | Put on
"to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness" (Eph. 4:22-24 ESV)
Put off: Satan; temptation; sin; slavery; false teachers; idols; selfishness; anger; gossip; foolishness; pride; blaming God; guilt and shame
Put on: God; repentance of my sin or forgiveness of another’s sin; Jesus; repentance unto salvation; Holy Spirit; sanctification; fruit; spiritual gifts; spiritual disciplines; identity in Christ; healthy emotions
Article: David—Young and Forgotten by Bryan Carlson
David was chosen by God as a young man, though he may not have been noticed by anyone else.
1 Samuel 16:1-13—David anointed as king; story of Samuel anointing David who would not have been his first choice for king. Samuel first sees Eliab and was sure the Lord was going to choose him as the next king. David’s own father forgets about him out in the field taking care of the sheep. Jesse doesn’t think he is significant enough to invite him to the line up.
But God does not look at the things man looks at (1 Sam 16:7). "But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.’"
David was around 17 years old when he was anointed as God’s chosen king. For the next nine years, David goes relatively unnoticed. But he still remained faithful to God.
One person who does notice David was Saul. David spent much of his time fleeing for his life. Saul is jealous of David and is trying to kill him.
1 Samuel 19:1-12: Saul tries to kill David
1 Samuel 21-31: David flees and is on the run from Saul
1 Samuel 24: David spared Saul’s life—goes to bathroom in cave David is hiding in
1 Samuel 26: David again spared Saul—walked into camp where sleeping and took spear and water jug and then called out to Saul. Saul responds the same as before.
1 Samuel 30:6: “…David found strength in the Lord his God.”
In 1 Samuel 31, Saul dies; the throne of the kingdom is finally open. In 2 Samuel 2:1-4, David is anointed king over Judah, the southern two tribes of Israel.
He’s now around 23 years old. He’s spent several years of his life running for his life from Saul. He was faithful to God the entire time and waited for his perfect timing. David was a man after God’s own heart. He was faithful in the little things. He was faithful when he was young, and it didn’t look like anyone was noticing. God always notices and will reward us for our faithfulness.
We see in 2 Samuel 2:8-11, Saul’s son Ish-bosheth is made king over Israel: David still doesn’t have control of the majority of the kingdom. So, he was anointed at 17, spent five years fleeing, and now he has limited rule of the kingdom for the next seven years. Some people would have given up and done things his own way. Not David. He followed God’s perfect plan. And it finally paid off. Finally when he was 30 years old God made him king over Israel—the job he was anointed to do 13 years earlier.
Sometimes you might feel insignificant—like no one knows who you are or no one really ever notices you. Sometimes you don’t think it matters how you behave because no one notices anyway. Actually, it is kind of fun to get in trouble sometimes because then you get noticed. God always notices. You are important to God—he knows you, he watches your every move, he expects complete faithfulness and obedience during this time in your life. If you want to be someone important and be used by God, start now by being faithful in the little things. David was faithful in the little things. We often think of David as a great king. We look over the way he lived the part of his life that no one was watching. Character—who you are when no one but God is watching.
Resources
“Unlikely Fighter” by Greg Stier
"Shadow of the Almighty: The Life and Testament of Jim Elliot" by Elizabeth Elliott
"Through Gates of Splendor" by Elizabeth Elliott
“Rachel’s Tears” by Beth Nimmo and Darrell Scott
“Good and Angry” by David Powlison
