Identity
Who am I? How do I see myself? How do others see me? Do I have value or worth?
Identity is significant because it shapes who we are, how we perceive ourselves, and how we are perceived by others. In our society, our identity is a multifaceted concept that encompasses various aspects of our life, including our ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, cultural background, social class, and more. Identity provides us with a sense of belonging and helps us understand our place in the world. It informs our values, beliefs, and behaviors and influences how we interact with others. It also plays a crucial role in shaping our life experiences and opportunities.
You hear a lot in our world today about identity and how our identity is something to be celebrated. I identify as a man, a woman, black, gay, bi, trans, non-binary, an alcoholic, sex addict, etc.
Many now use pronouns to help others know how they would like us to identify them:
He/him: Used by individuals who identify as male.
She/her: Used by individuals who identify as female.
They/them: Used by individuals who identify as non-binary or genderqueer, or for those who prefer to not use gender-specific pronouns.
Ze/hir: Used by individuals who identify as genderqueer or non-binary.
Xe/xem: Used by individuals who identify as non-binary or genderqueer.
Ey/em: Used by individuals who identify as genderqueer or non-binary.
Ve/ver: Used by individuals who identify as non-binary or genderqueer.
Ironically, our society preaches the more we celebrate ourselves, the stronger, healthier and freer we become. In actuality, we are spiraling deeper and deeper into slavery, depravity, and hopelessness. We are warned in Isaiah 5:20: "Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness; Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!"
An unhealthy outcome of identity is putting ourselves at the center of our story as opposed to God. One of the primary foci of much counseling and psychology is finding ourselves, being proud of ourselves, celebrating ourselves, empowering ourselves. This is the exact opposite of what Scripture teaches.
"Then Jesus said to His disciples, 'If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me'" (Matthew 16:24).
"For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think" (Romans 12:3a).
"I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me" (Galatians 2:20).
"Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility consider one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross" (Philippians 2:3-8).
These verses highlight the need for Believers to have a balanced and humble view of themselves and to use our gifts and abilities in service to God and others, rather than for our own selfish gain or self-promotion. The goal is humility and self-denial. Loving your neighbor as yourself does not mean loving yourself more so you have the capacity to love others and love God. We are told to love ourselves less.
Additionally, we are never meant to identify with our sin. We are made in the image of God. "So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them" (Genesis 1:27). It is grievous to God for us, made in the image of a holy God, to identify ourselves by our sin.
"Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor those who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor those habitually drunk, nor verbal abusers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
Also see Romans 1:18-32
Until we learn to identify, first and foremost, as a follower of Christ, we will be enslaved to our selfish desires and our sin. Instead of confidence and pride, we will continue to sink deeper and deeper into confusion and despair. "It was for freedom that Christ set us free” (Galatians 5:1a). Let’s repent and believe the Good News!
Questions to answer with our counselee
How does your understanding of your identity affect your thoughts, feelings, and behavior?
What factors have shaped your identity, both positively and negatively?
How do you define yourself, and how does this align with what the Bible says about your identity in Christ?
What role does your relationship with God play in shaping your identity?
How do you view yourself in relation to others, and how does this impact your relationships?
What are some areas of your life where you struggle with feeling secure in your identity?
How does your understanding of your identity impact your sense of purpose and direction in life?
How does your identity impact your decision-making process?
How does your understanding of your identity impact your view of your past, present, and future?
What steps can you take to grow in your understanding of your identity in Christ and live more fully into who God has created you to be?
Stories to consider
Mary Magdalene
The story of Mary Magdalene is recorded in all four Gospels. Mary Magdalene was a woman from the town of Magdala. She had a troubled past and was known to be a sinner. Some scholars believe that she may have been a prostitute or had a reputation for being immoral. However, when Mary Magdalene encountered Jesus, her life was transformed.
In the Gospel of Luke, it is recorded that Jesus cast out seven demons from her. This encounter freed her from the bondage of her past and enabled her to become a devoted follower of Jesus.
Mary Magdalene was present at many of the key moments in Jesus' life and ministry. She was at the foot of the cross when Jesus was crucified, and she was the first person to see Him after He rose from the dead.
In the Gospel of John, it is recorded that on the day of Jesus' resurrection, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb where He had been buried. When she arrived, she found that the stone had been rolled away from the tomb. She was distraught and thought that someone had stolen Jesus' body. However, when she turned around, she saw Jesus standing there, but she did not recognize Him at first.
Jesus asked her, "Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?" Mary Magdalene, thinking that Jesus was the gardener, said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him." Jesus then said her name, "Mary," and she immediately recognized Him.
The story of Mary Magdalene teaches us that no matter what our current identity, we can be transformed by encountering Jesus. He sees us not as we see ourselves but as who we can become in Him. Her encounter with Jesus completely transformed her life. She went from being a sinner with a troubled past to becoming one of Jesus' most devoted followers. Her identity was changed, and she became a witness to the power of Jesus' resurrection.
James and John
According to the accounts in Mark 10:34-35 and Matthew 20:20-28, two of Jesus’ disciples, James and John, the sons of Zebedee, approached Jesus and asked Him to grant them a special request. They said, "Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you." Jesus responded by asking them what they wanted, and they replied, "Grant that we may sit, one on your right and one on your left, in your glory."
Jesus told them that they did not know what they were asking for and that He could not grant their request to sit on His right and left, as those places were reserved for others.
When the other disciples heard about James and John's request, they became indignant. Jesus then called them together and said, "You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
This story teaches us about the importance of humility and service in the kingdom of God. Jesus reminds us that true greatness is not found in positions of power or authority, but in serving others with love and compassion, just as He did when He gave His life for us.
Verses for study
Genesis 1:27 - "So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."
Galatians 2:20 - "I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me."
1 John 3:1 - "See how great a love the Father has given us, that we would be called children of God; and in fact we are."
John 1:12 - "Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God."
Romans 8:14 - "For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons and daughters of God."
2 Corinthians 5:17 - "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!"
2 Corinthians 5:21 - "He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him."
Galatians 3:26 - "So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith."
Ephesians 1:5 - "He predestined us to adoption as sons and daughters through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will."
Ephesians 2:10 - "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
Philippians 3:20-21 - "For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ; who will transform the body of our humble state into conformity with the body of His glory, by the exertion of the power that He has even to subject all things to Himself."
Colossians 3:3 - "For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God."
2 Timothy 3:1-2: In the last days, men will be lovers of self.
1 Peter 2:9-10 - "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy."
Put off | Put on
"to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness" (Eph. 4:22-24 ESV)
Put off: Satan; temptation; sin; slavery; false teachers; idols; selfishness; anger; gossip; foolishness; pride; blaming God; guilt and shame
Put on: God; repentance of my sin or forgiveness of another’s sin; Jesus; repentance unto salvation; Holy Spirit; sanctification; fruit; spiritual disciplines; healthy emotions
Article: The Image of God in Man by Bryan Carlson
“The fact that man is in the image of God means that man is like God and represents God. The image of God in man refers to the aspects of humanity that reflect the character and nature of God. It is a spiritual and moral quality, rather than a physical resemblance, and it encompasses aspects of humanity such as reason, free will, creativity, and the capacity for relationship and community” (Grudem 442).
This doctrine is based on several key passages in the Bible, including Genesis 1:26-27, which says, "Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. So, God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." Genesis 5:1 says, “When God created man, he made him on the likeness of God.” God created a body, but the life—the Spirit—came from God. Man is a spirit being living in a human body (Ezra 1:5; Job 32:8; Psalm 51:12; Prov. 20:27; Isa. 57:16; 1 Cor. 2:11). God also created woman from man and was created with this same spirit. Man was created by God in the image and likeness of God (Gen. 1:26-27; 5;1; 1 Cor. 11:7; James 3:9). This is what gives man more worth than the rest of God’s creation. Genesis 9:6 says that if a man sheds another man’s blood, his blood must also be shed for man is created in the likeness of God.
What about the Fall? Sin entered the world through Adam and now is inherent in all men. Man is now conceived in sin (Psalm 51:5) and dies as a result of sin: “Therefore, just as through one man sin entered into the world, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men, because all sinned” (Romans 5:12). Since all mankind is conceived from Adam and since we have all chosen to sin, man’s natural state is to now be separated from the love of God for all eternity. God’s image was distorted, but not lost (Gen 9:6, James 3:9).
So, what is the “image of God” in man? Many ways in which we image God is done through physical means—God given skills, thinking and creativity, bearing children who bear our image (Gen 5:3). “Even the body is destined to in the end a spiritual body, that is, a body which is completely spirit-controlled, a perfect instrument of the soul” (Berkhof 205). Morally, we have an inner sense of right and wrong. Spiritually, we relate to God and are immortal. Mentally, we possess things rationally, logically, with abstract reasoning, the use of abstract, complex, language (Isaiah 1:18-20). We have an awareness of time—past, present, and the distant future, music, art, literature, technology, and complex emotions. Relationally, we enjoy work, church, family, marriage, fellowship (John 17:20-26). Functionally, “the exercise of dominion over the creation” (Erickson 527); (Psalm 8). (Roy 15).
The image of God in man has significant practical implications for life and Biblical Counseling. First, it provides a foundation for the value and worth of every human being, regardless of their circumstances or background. Second, it provides a framework for understanding the purpose and meaning of life. Recognizing that humanity is created in the image of God can help individuals seek to fulfill their role and purpose in life, as they seek to glorify God and live in accordance with His plans and purposes. “It is only the Christian, then, who can be counseled. Anything short of the effort to bring about the renewal of the divine image in man is an unacceptable goal because likeness (alone) is God’s goal for man. That is why Christian counseling, stressing salvation and sanctification, is adequate” (Adams 120). “The goal of counseling should be to facilitate the restoration of the image of God to its proper functioning in all of the practical ways it has been shattered in the lives of those who come to see a counselor” (Lambert 190).
Our goal is to be transformed into the likeness of Christ (2 Corinthians 3:18) and to put on “the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator, to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Colossians 3:9-10; Ephesians 4:22-24). Jesus is the image of God (2 Corinthians 4:4). “He is the image to the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation” (Colossians 1:15). Whoever has seen Jesus has seen the Father (John 14:8-9). He is the exact representation of the Father (Hebrews 1:3). “Just as we have borne the image of the man of dust, we shall also bear the image of the man of heaven” (1 Corinthians 15:49). “When he appears, we shall be like him” (1 John 3:2). One day, when we are glorified, we will be in the perfect likeness of God once again. “We do not get to choose whether we represent God in the world. That is already true of us. The only issue that remains is whether we will acknowledge that fact and respond to it in a way that honors God” (Lambert 189).
Wayne Grudem, Systematic Theology, 442-450.
Louis Berkhof, Systematic Theology, New Com. Ed., 202-210.
Millard Erickson, Christian Theology, 517-536.
Don Roy, IBCD, ACBC Theology Exam Study Guide, 15.
Jay Adams, A Theology of Christian Counseling, 118-120.
Heath Lambert, A Theology of Biblical Counseling, 180-213.
