Anger and Strategies to Overcome
by Bryan Carlson
“Anger is our whole-personed active response of negative moral judgement against perceived evil” (Jones 15). “It is an active response: it is something we do. A whole-personed active response: It always involves beliefs and motives, perceptions and desires. A response against something: provocation is not causation! The real cause is what lies in our heart. Involves a negative moral judgement: what you did was wrong or unjust! Against perceived evil: May be accurate or inaccurate” (Roy 5). Anger is not inherently sinful, but it can become sinful when it is not expressed or controlled in a healthy and biblical manner. The Believer is commanded to be angry without sinning (Ephesians 4:26).
Manifestations of anger in the inner man can include feelings of annoyance, frustration, resentment, self-pity, brooding, or bitterness (Ephesians 4:31; Ecclesiastes 7:9). “When a little thing pushed your button, it says something big about the buttons inside of you” (Powlison 12). “You shall not hate your brother in your heart, but you shall reason frankly with your neighbor…not bear a grudge” (Leviticus 19:17-18). Outwardly, anger can manifest as verbal or physical aggression, explosive outbursts, sulking, or withdrawing from others.
Factors that drive anger can include real/perceived wrongs incurred against God, others, or self (Genesis 4:3–8; Ruth 1:20; Jonah 4:1; Psalm 7:11; Acts 17:16) including injustice, unrighteousness, hurt, frustration, and a sense of violation of one's rights or values. Anger can also stem from a desire for control, fear, or feelings of vulnerability or from undealt with problems (Ephesians 4:26–27).
The Bible provides several strategies for responding to anger:
Seek to understand the root cause of your anger and address it in a biblical manner (James 1:19-20; Proverbs 15:1).
Seek wisdom from God and submit to His guidance in how to respond to your anger (Proverbs 3:5-6; James 1:5).
Practice self-control and resist the temptation to lash out in anger (Galatians 5:22-23; Ephesians 4:26-27).
Seek to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry (James 1:19).
Pray for those who have wronged you, rather than harboring anger and bitterness towards them (Matthew 5:44).
Seek to forgive others, as God has forgiven you (Ephesians 4:32).
Seek reconciliation with those you are angry with, as far as it depends on you (Romans 12:18).
Seek to love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:39), and to do unto others as you would have them do unto you (Luke 6:31).
God provides grace that allows me to:
exercise self-control, patience, and gentleness (Gal 5:22-23; James 1:19);
speak with gentleness and grace (Eph 4:29);
lovingly do good to those who wronged me (Rom 12:9-21, Gen 5:21);
receive correction, even from those who hurt me (Prov 9:8; 13:10);
pursue restoration of those who hurt me, remembering their sin is primarily against God (Ps 51:4). My objective is to restore (not vent or judge) my brother/sister (Matt 5:21-16; 18:15). (Roy 5-7)
Robert Jones, Uprooting Anger, 15.
Don Roy, IBCD, ACBC Theology Exam Study Guide, 5-7.
David Powlison, Good and Angry: Redeeming Anger, Irritation, Complaining, and Bitterness, 12.
